I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
it was like having sex with a tree stump
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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