Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
