is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
