he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Randomize
