I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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