She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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