the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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