then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
