She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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