I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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