I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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