You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
