My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
