Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
