oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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