Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
