He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
