Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
please don't ironically join a cult
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