Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Terrible idea I love it
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
