Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
