When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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