Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Randomize
