You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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