he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
