Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
