Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
