We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
