3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
