great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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