I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
