If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
