Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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