Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Randomize
