My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
