Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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