he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
