he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
