At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
