Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
