I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
try to milk me bitch
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