I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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