Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
