He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Randomize
