I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
So much rum. So many feels.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Randomize
