the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
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