I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
