It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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