I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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