I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
