Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
